Finding Uryuu Revisted
by Tytue
Summary: Alicia leaves home after dealing for five years with the suicide of her father, and neglect of her vain mother. Desperate to find her own life and power of control she moves to Japan as an exchange student where she meets Uryu. Uryuu x O.C Read and Review
1. Chapter 1

_**Yay!

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_**May 20, 2005: My wardrove is now black. **_

_My father hangs himself in my mother's side of the bedroom. I walk in just as he jumps from the chair. I scream._

(Written on Wall next to closet door)

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My mother is touching me. And its not because I'm leaving for a Country over one thousands miles away for three years. She's touching me because her hands are cold and my face is warm against her skin. Washington D.C. can be a real bitch to a woman who refused to wear her gloves because she claimed they clashed with her boots.

To my mother I had already left five years ago, just a shadow a figment of her imagination. Nothing more at the moment, than a space heater for her frostbitten fingers. I take whatever form she needs, be it space heater, cushion, confession booth.

" Oh let her go Teeny," Rob replied. Rob my mother's husband as of four years ago. Businessman, political researcher, genius, who knew nothing of my mother's real actions, her real motives for her actions. Mom's hands leave me then, her attention with it. The air about us returns to how it was just fifteen minutes before.

She turns away from me and I don't complain. Rob taps my shoulder. I try not to glare or snap at him. He's looming over me, a whooping five foot seven; mom always liked taller men. I wonder faintly if I got that gene from her. His hair is black, slick and cut fairly close to his head. Eyes slighted and cheekbones raised to meet the curve of his face. He looks Japanese but I can see the Caucasian and foreign features of his face. I try to hide my disgust for him.

On the meantime he looks concerned for me, even the grip he had on my shoulder tightens. I come to a realization that pulling back from the man, who paid for half of my intuition to studying abroad, is best thing to do. No matter how much his tan hand and strong grip make me want to puke.

" Your mother and I will be sending you money through your Paypal account and checks by mail. Be sure to call if you need anything. I have partners in high places, I can have just about anything for you arranged." And I nod because I know he wasn't lying. He was anything but poor, and very socially intertwined.

The flight board switches so that my flight is placed under the arriving section marked with a highlighter green. Mom who was rubbing the sullen center of her abdomen, filled with child, picks up her head quickly. " Her flight," is all she says. Really the only last words she ever says to me before she just about falls over trying to help me load the bags I was allowed to carry onto the plane.

* * *

This is my second time being on a plane. My first was with my father on the way to California. He was a graphic designer, who had big clients in big places. I was not originally supposed to go, but after crying he'd decided that getting out was probably the best thing. Normally a mother would complain, saying that her child needed as much school as possible before the world spontaneously combusted; but Teeny was happy to get rid of me, no me or my father meant more time with her secret Rob.

" More tea?" The flight attendant, who's name tag read " Kelly," asked.

I shook my head. " How much time until we reach the next port?"

" Three hours," she answered.

Three hours to sit curled up on a plane, steel toed boots tearing at the lining of the seat in front of me, black pants riding up the inclines of my crotch, Avenged Sevenfold playing in my ears loud enough for the whole plane to hear. Three hours was a long and dangerous time for someone like me to be set to thinking.

* * *

" Get up on your feet boy and try again," he said the scent of the aftershave bathing his body. Get up and wash; come down stairs to be beckoned Uryu so-called father to begin training. Yes this was the morning routine or as least for him it was. One that he'd had gotten used to as the days eased by or so he thought. "Had enough already Uryu?" He asked kicking his rib cage; he cringed but didn't cry out.

He made his way up to look him dead in the eyes knowing very well that he was no where near done. He still had a bit of energy left. Enough for one shot, one single shot this time he would beat him. This time he will not get the best of him. Standing up slowly he pulled back his hand and shot.

The sound of him clapping arose from the dust . " Very good Uryu. Very good. Must I make you angry just to achieve some improvement?" He was smiling. That taunting smile, " you're never amount to half of what I am" it said. " keep trying harder." Uryu hated that smile. He hated it with a sick passion. " Being with Soul Reapers has made you weak," he said. Uryu glared at him.

He had been told he looked like him. Told that he nose was similar to his. His eyes, they way the irises dusted blue. Even their mouths looked the same, they said. Uryu hated those comments as well. He believed he looked nothing like that man. While his skin showed an even amount of healthiness, Uryu's shone white and fragile. His hair was gray with age, while Uryu still maintained its blackness, still ran in long streaks down his face and trailed to the back of his head.

" That is enough for today. Your body has reached its limit. Pushing you any further would only mean your death." He sounded almost concerned, almost caring of whether or not Uryu died.

" What should you care?" Uryu snapped pulling myself up. He didn't answer.

" If you are in good enough shape you should go to school. Your grades must be lowering from all the days missed."

" And you care?"

Pulling out his lighter he lit it slowly, the bud of the cigarette burned a yellowish ember color. " I don't," he replied placing it in his mouth. " But you're already a failure at being a Quincy. To be a failure in school as well would only bring about more embarrassments."

Glaring Uryu held my mouth closed, and instead settled on watching the smoke rise slowly from his cigarette. Thinking to himself that if he didn't kill him at least the cigarette's he insisted on smoking would. Taking a long puff he turned on his heel. " I will return here in three days, be here. Your training will resume there." He started towards the door. Pausing when he halfway reached his destination. " Please come with a little more to look forward too son," he replied stepping out.

Uryu watched him go, unmoving. That white suit, he always wore still unstained with not even a hint of blood dirt or debris. It made him sick. If only he could let him see at least that much.

_**

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_**August 9, 2010 10:23 a.m.: Lost shirt**_

_Arrived at the new port. Got a text from my mother. _

_**Mom:**__**You have my designer Indian silk shirt **_

_I check my bag. _

_I do have it. _

_I don't text back. The shirt is black, I'll keep it. _

( Written on tag of the Designer shirt.)

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	2. Chapter 2

**_Another shapter. Feed Back is very welcome!_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own bleach or any of its characters..._**

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August 10, 2010 2:00 p.m:

_Arrived at the Japanese airport. _

Got text from Rob

**_Rob: How's it going. Are you there yet?" _**

Me: Arrived

_That's all I say, that's all that necessary. _

(Written on back of Airline Peanut package).

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There's a guy waiting for me when I step off, half disoriented and groggy from the long trip over. He's Japanese (as expected), about his middle thirties with a beard and slightly ragged face, beside him there's a Japanese woman. In the Japanese man's hand there is a sign read " Alicia," and in her hand on read, " John." I trail over recognizing the sign for me.

" Alicia?" The man asked in English. Alicia the forbidden name, back home my name was never really spoken, as if it were some sort of taboo. When said out loud, my name that is, my mother would break out in crying fits, claiming the name hurt her, made her seem worthless, ugly, as if stained by the name just as much as I was. Instead Rob with hopes that my mother would no longer be bothered when my name was called gave me the nickname "Curly." I did not argue when he decided this, just rolled with it.

I answered the man in Japanese.

He answered in turn, " We are waiting for John. Then we will transport you too your staying destination and from there you can start off your studying."

I nodded having nothing else too say on the matter. Three straight years I had been working on getting this far. Starting off where my father left off on my language studies. When he alive he left no stone unturned, teaching me in every way possible to contain myself in the real world. He made sure I could speak the most basic of phrases in different languages. Sentences such as " Where can I find a bathroom," or " I think I am lost can you direct me," in Spanish, Portuguese, French, Chinese, and Vietnamese, were no problem for me.

Japanese was just the one I picked from the list of what I knew to continue with further.

John arrived as planned, and we set on our way, getting into our assigned car to go to our assigned homes. Which for me would be my step-Aunt, which was Rob's oldest sister. Piles of paperwork had condemned me to her doorstep far before I got the chance to have a say so. Yet another thing I had accepted to "roll" with.

**_

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**_August 10, 2010 _**

The place I'm going is Karakura town. Its west of Tokyo, or so explains the driver of the van I'm sitting in.

**_I get no new text messages from Rob or my Mom. _**

The air here seems thinner than it is at the airport, and I can't sense something very weird about the place.

That makes me like it even more.

It's not home.

**_Which means it's the best thing happening to me right now. _**

The exchanged student next to me won't stop staring.

( Written on map attracted to the van's seat cover.)

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I get dropped off first, with a handful of paperwork and traditional good luck on my first day tomorrow. My Aunts not there, but instead there is a note on her door telling me to go right on in and make myself comfortable while I'm at it. Her house is not very big and the ceiling isn't very high, but I get in anyway.

I glanced around, which obviously was usually the first thing people did when they came to a new environment. There were pictures everywhere, pictures of the woman I assumed was my Aunt Nellie. Nellie on a motorcycle, Nellie sporting a tiny bathing suit on the cover of some Japanese sports magazine. The long line of vanity must have started here, because everywhere I turned there were just pictures of her.

Still looking around I followed her instructions and wandered around the semi-small house, admiring how quaint it was. I reached an empty room with just a bed, dresser and slide open closet as well as a window. Assuming it was mine I made a point of unpacking my things. As far as the stuff I carried, it was whatever I could stuff into the three bags I was allowed to bring, which in this case was half my room. My stitch dolls, and posters, accessories and knickknacks, my wardrobe since I did not have much I really wanted to bring, was not an issue. What consisted of my old room when I was done were the various note written on every piece of visible wall of the room. Left behind feelings that would stay as they were, even if my mother painted over of scrubbed them off, the remnants would still remain.

Feeling minor satisfaction on that thought I unpacked the rest of my stuff and started to assemble my room.

**

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**

**Uryu **

Uryu decided to eat lunch with his comrades today, well decided was not really a good choice of words. More like he was approached my Orihime given a choice, then before he could answer was grabbed my both Chad and Ichigo as they dragged him down the hall.

So reluctant he sat Orihime holding what looked like ketchup over rice balls towards his face urging him to take one.

" You don't want one?" the auburn haired girl replied. He shook his head. She shrugged then shoved on into her mouth. "Ok…more for me I guess."

**_

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**_August 10_**

First day in my new room.

Completely whelmed.

I say whelmed because nothing remotely life-changing has happened.

Not yet anyway. Lets wait until tomorrow.

(Written on wall beside bed.)

* * *

I fell asleep on my bed halfway though, my new bed, which smelled weirdly, like salmon, a stark contrast to my bed back at my mother's house, which smelled of lavender and soft pine. When I woke up it was 3:00 a.m.

I searched the house for signs of life among the lifeless staring pictures, only to get the reply of the TV, and a loud snore.

My aunt who've I've never met before, laid sprawled out on her couch bag of chips on her belly and water bottle in her hand. I couldn't see her face because in addition to the bag of chips on her belly and water bottle, there was a brown pillow on her face. I thought about shaking her awake, then thought better of it. If she was anything like her brother Rob she did not like being woken up. Then again who did?

Instead I stalked back to (the room I assumed was mine) and lay down against the salmon smelling cushion to go back to sleep. But even then try as I might I could not find the will to sleep again. I thought about what my father would think if he saw me now, in another country, going to another school, away from my mother. Then again he wouldn't be surprised, I remember as far back as kindergarten, telling him that I would move as far as away as possible when I got the chance. Not far away from him of course, but my mother and her excessive complaining. She never did the curliness of my hair; she always preferred straight hair, believing it to be prettier than curls. So when it was time for her too do my hair she would jerk my head around excessively and complain out loud to my father, who might have been drawing something at the time, that I got the annoying curly hair from him, then while she was at it complain also about my bland brown eyes. Even though my father's hair was neither curly, nor his eyes brown, in fact it was the exact opposite, my mother's hair was curly and her eyes were brown, so I got it from her and not my father. She'd after many years of Perm and contacts had in fact forgotten how she herself looked. I on the other hand was a consist reminder, I looked nothing like my father as he had claimed, not one bit.

" I'm just a big ball of mistakes to you aren't I?" I whispered into the air, daring someone anyone to hear, listen.

Someone listen…

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**Feedback please. On to next chapter. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Another Chapter. Sorry it took so long, I've been going through a lot lately and it hasn't been going any better. So here it is! Enjoy **

**R&R**

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Aunt Nellie woke me up just before my alarm clock went off. She looked so different than when I saw her sleeping. Different as in not like the picture. Had I not been taught proper manners by my father I would have stared at her appearance, because in all reality it was altered past the forms I saw on the walls of the home. There were scars on her face, light bumped scratches that ran up the left side of her face, pulling her lips up slightly, spreading to her eye only to skip the socket and continue up to her eyebrow.

All in all it appeared like she had gotten into an altercation with a very angry cat and paid the bigger price. Beauty was there I could not lie about that, even with the scars spoiling the left side of her face the illumination of the tranquil smile, and genuine twinkle of the eye proved to me at least that much.

" Good morning," she called in Japanese of course. I bowed traditionally to her, despite the linger of my eyes and stiffness of my neck. She grinned. " You'll get used to the time stream."

" Still working on it," I said yawning. She lead me back into her living room where she gave me my issued uniform then showed me where the bathroom was. The tub was kinda small and she apologized for that, I shook my head and dropped my clothes on the sink's counter.

" It's ok," I said. " I'm not a big fan of baths anyway."

" You wouldn't be the first," she said walking out leaving me alone to wash and get dressed.

I'd worn uniforms before at my old school so this was nothing really new, and they weren't much different except for the fact that the skirts were a little bit shorter. I brushed it off a matter of preface.

After washing and dressing Aunt Nellie explained to me as I ate Lucky Charms, ( her favorite cereal), that she would walk me down to a man named Mr. Kurosaki's who owned a clinic where his son Ichigo Kurosaki would walk with me to school.

" He's a very handsome young man," she cooed turning to face me. " Rob told me about your hobbies. And I just want to say that here that is not a problem. Any part of your room is accessible to you. Write as you please."

I nodded holding back the fact that Rob had not idea what I really did or my hobbies for that matter. She grinned. " And as far as piercing any more parts of your body, I am all for self expression. Through-" her voice lowered. " I'm not completely sure about the school? You're know when you get there I guess." She shrugged the matter off. I touched the silver handing from my bottom lobe.

" Its not a problem if I have to take them out," I said. She wasn't listening, she'd already moved to the door, pulling on her shoes in the process pulled my bag unto my shoulder.

" Ready to go?" She said.

" As ready as I'll ever be," I said.

" That's good," she replied absently leading me out the front door and down the street before stopping. " Across the street, around the corner to your left," she said.

Was she not going to show me? I turned to ask her but she was already heading the opposite direction the direction back to her house. No goodbye or have a nice day, nothing but the view of her lean back. I followed her directions anyway.

I approached the clinic, right where Nellie said it would be, thinking of what I should say, who I should be when the doors finally opened and someone stepped out. This place wasn't like my old school, the people I knew before. These were new all new. No one knew me. I could be anyone I wanted to be, anything. I took a deep breath steadying myself before lifting my fist to knock.

The door opened before I could even touch the door.

Looming front of me was a teenager no older than me with orange hair and eyes the color of amber. Something brown rolled off his shoulder, and into both of my hands, with a " uff."

" Um…"

He took the object from my hands. "I've been looking all over the place for this," he said. I eyed the object in his hands. A stuffed lion.

" Your welcome," I said. He scowled then threw the lion over his shoulder back into the Clinic.

" I think I have the wrong place," I said, " I'm looking for Ichigo Kurosaki? Son of…"

He rubbed the back of his head. The scowl disappeared. " You're the one Dad told me about," he said. " Alina…no….Amanda…."

" Alicia," I said.

" You…" he started. But I interrupted him.

" I like to spare the last names, I have too many of them anyway. Yes the piercing did hurt and no I did not do them all myself."

" I wasn't going to ask you any of that," he said.

" Sooner or later you would," I said.

" Yeah maybe," he said.

" Sorry, first impressions never go too well for me. I've probably already managed to convince you that I'm the rudest person you've ever met," I said trying my best to sound friendly, to sound happy. He was really the first guy I'd spoken too since coming out of Aunt Nellie's and his face wasn't too bad to look at either. Scaring him off would not be good. " Sorry. Ok lets start over…I'm Alicia…"

"Ahh…my names Ichigo," he greeted holding out a calloused hand. I stood motionless studying his face for a moment. Then reaching out I grabbed his hand.

" Ichigo means strawberry right?" I said trying to sound smart, trying to make a joke.

" No," he said his face twisting like he was about to exclaim something, then shifting, looking off somewhere far, somewhere foreign. I followed his line of vision with my own, seeing nothing. I reasoned that maybe he was like that, that maybe like me he did the same. Folding my hands over my bag I followed beside him, saying nothing.

Finally after a moment he said. " Your American?"

I nodded. " I lived in South Carolina…a place called…well never mind what's its called in not important…this is my home now."

" Oh," he mumbled. I nodded.

" So does everyone have the color hair or is it just you?" I asked coolly. His eyes flickered over too me, and his already threatening scowl turned fierce.

" Born with it," he replied simply. " It's been this color ever since I can remember."

" Oh…" I sighed. His scowl loosened.

" Why!" He exclaimed. " You got a problem with my hair color?"

" No," I said ignoring him standing in front of me. His obvious height looming over me. Suddenly I felt very, very small. Looking away I tried to hide my embarrassment, put off the fact that I just got ahead of myself once again and blurted what I was thinking out loud. " Its just different," I finally sighed glanced up at him slowly.

His hand came up slowly, I closed my eyes. Weight centered on the top of my head, and before I knew any better I had opened both eyes and was looking up at Ichigo. Ichigo the guy I had just met not even ten minutes ago with his large hand on the top of my head. Smiling down at me like I was one of his good friends.

My heart galloped in my chest blissfully, at the comprehension of what was happening. _Could he be like the first friend I make here…_

He moved away then, folding his hands in his pockets and walking ahead. I followed hiding the joy on my face under a thick mask of aloof mendacity. I couldn't know for sure, like everything in my life, nothing was for sure, nothing was set in stone. He led me to the school, looking back every so often.

" What class are you in?" He finally asked once we'd reached eye sight of the school. Rambling through my bag I handed him my paper.

" Same class as me," he said walking on ahead. " The bell just range but it should be ok," he said.

He lead me to the classroom, sighing to myself I followed his lead and walked in.

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**August 11**

Every eye was one me.

The new girl.

The freak.

At least that's how my last school would discribe me…I wonder how this one will…?

( Written on fold seat of paper)

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I stood staring at everyone staring at me. Maybe it was the black hair, or the mascara or the piercing. Or maybe it was because I walked in with Ichigo, who immediately went right too a seat beside an Auburn haired girl. I was handed a marker. Turning I wrote my full name on the board.

_Alicia McHal. Not Rob's last name, but my Dad's my real Dad's. _

Afterwards taking the first seat I saw, at the back of the class. Just like at my old school, never the front, never the middle, always the back nearest the closest corner. Away from people, away from potential friends. Without any perspicacity.

" Uryu can you please help Alicia needs it be the one to translate something for her if she doesn't understand at any point during class."

" Uryu… Uryu?" I asked looking around.

" Uryu please raise your hand."

Complying with her request the guy beside me raised his hand slightly. " Oh," I said glancing over his features. He was the complete opposite of Ichigo as far as looks go. His hair was jet black and pooled down over his face in two long bangs, his eyes a light blue pooled lightly with his pale skin. Giving him a ghostly and mysterious appearance. Glancing over at Ichigo I quickly adverted my eyes when I noticed his attention was completely turned towards the auburn girl. He was whispering something too her that made her blush then turn her gaze my way. I didn't move, as they both looked my way, awkward smiles on their faces.

I tried to smile back, erasing monetarily my mask.

Class began then. I kept my front to the front, but monitored with my eyes. All novel faces. I tried to place the faces of my old life in their seats. I closed my eyes, a moment later the bell sounded, and when I opened my eyes Ichigo stood in front of my desk beside him the Auburn hair girl hands interlocked.

" Hey, Chad you ready for lunch?" Ichigo called.

" Yeah give me a second." Chad replied.

" Hey you."

I turned standing behind me was the biggest guy I've ever seen. Brown wavy locks drifted over his face and covered one of his eyes. His skin a darkest tan kinda of color glowed in the light from the window. His muscular and massive exterior doubled in the size of both Ichigo and Uryu put together. Before I knew what I was doing I mouth the word " Wow."

" Me," I replied after a moment of collecting myself.

" Yes," he replied.

" What?"

" Do you want to sit with us at lunch?" Chad offered.

" Oh you want me the weird girl too sit with you?" I added slyly.

" I'm not particularly worried about you killing me," he replied reaching on my desk and like a good gentlemen grabbing my new books and folding them under his muscle-bounded arm. " Now are you coming?"

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	4. Chapter 4

**Another Chappy. Enjoy and ReVIew...**

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August 11- Lunch.

The moment where everything is recollected where most souls are judged. This will decide whether or not I sit with people or entertain the squirrels and birds in the courtyard.

( Written on side of backpack)

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They seemed normal enough just viewing them from the distance that was my seat in the classroom. But that was only a shallow eye viewing. Up close they were anything but. The auburn haired girl who introduced herself as Orihime immediately pulled out her lunch then opened it revealing to me a concoction of foods that were barely recognizable as food. Sighing loudly she clasped both her hands together and loudly announced

" Itadakimasu." Soon being followed my Ichigo who mouthed it more than said it then Chad who mumbled it breathily.

Orihime looked to me her face twisted in mock disappointment. I clasped both hands together and said, " Itadakimasu."

" Now we eat," she said digging in. I took my time opening the lunch Aunt Nellie had prepared for me, hopping with all my might that I wasn't sushi. I'd neglected to tell her while I could that sushi while good to most people I found no delight in it, never did. And now that I was in Japan that still wouldn't change.

It was sushi.

I closed the box and sat in on my thigh.

" Something wrong?" Chad said. I turned to him, surprised he had even spoken to me in the first place. Anyone else I'd known wouldn't have even noticed I was out of sorts. Then again I didn't really know him.

Lie Alicia he doesn't really care about what's bothering you…he's just being nice to the new girl.

" I don't like sushi," I said.

" Here," folding his box towards me he sat it right in front of me. It was full of rice balls the size of my fist. I found myself glancing at the box then back up at him then at the box.

" We can switch," he said. " You do like Rice balls don't you?"

" Y-yes," I replied.

It reminded me of the nights my father was out late my mother cooked, how she was suddenly interested in Japanese dishes, and all she practiced making was sushi. I didn't like it, I hadn't since I looked at it. So on those nights I would go to bed hungry, only to be awaken by my father who'd brought me chicken nuggets from Mcdonalds.

" Don't tell your mother," he'd say slipping the box in my hands. " Leave the box under your pillow, I'll come get it in the morning."

I liked those times, how he seemed to know what I needed and when I needed it, how he cared. It had been so long since I felt that feeling, watching Chad take my unwanted food and give me his, felt like a deep gash had been opened up instead me spilling things I'd rather not feel.

I took a bit, my mouth suddenly tasted like lead, my throat burned.

I continued to eat.

" You like those," Orihime cheered. " I made them, I wanted Chad to try them but it's ok that you do."

" They taste different," I said.

" You think so? I knew my secret ingredient would work."

" Secret ingredient?"

" Peanut butter," she cheered.

I stopped chewing.

* * *

July 12 2002

_The teacher fed us peanut butter crackers and cheese. It was the first time I'd ever thrown up in class._

_I got the nickname puffy-mac throw up monster._

_My mom was the one to pick me up._

_She spanked me for ruining my new pink dress._

_I was in the first grade._

( Written in permanent ink on the side of the pink dress.)

* * *

This time there were not laughing snickering first graders with their name calling and obnoxious noises. There was only me standing firmly announcing I had to find the nurse, throat closing, face growing puffer by the moment, looking back and forth. Then Chad who'd been standing the entire time.

" You need to calm down," he suggested his voice calm. A little too calm. Standing in front of me he placed his hand on my shoulder. I stiffened. Stepping forward Chad picked me up and threw me securely over his shoulder. As if I were some kind of rag doll or something. I felt the bale rise in my throat. Gagging I gripped the back of Chad's shirt.

" I think I' m about too…" leaning away from his body I spewed my lunch all over the concrete and the back of his pants.

That was the moment embarrassment began and happiness ended. He hadn't noticed, or at least he pretended not too as he carried me, flung her his shoulder in the opposite direction. I managed to look up, to see the damage I'd done only to get a eyeful of Ichigo and Orihime following behind.

I' m in some kind of TV show. Stuff like this only happens to cliché school girls with a attractive faces and lots of personality. I had neither of any. So why was this happening to me.

I couldn't help thinking about my experience in first grade how my mother had spanked me just because I neglected to turn my head in the opposite direction, and ruined my new pink ruffled dress she's brought me. She called me ugly, saying I was just as disgusting as the boys who were calling me names. That she should have just put me in rags and sent me, if she'd known I would have made a mess of myself. I cried then, cried a lot, even after she'd walked away to talk on the phone. I cried until my Dad got home.

" What happened ma jolie?" He asked me picking me up. Mom moved from the phone then to answer for me.

" That pink dress I brought her, ruined," she said.

" Is that what happened?" Dad asked bouncing me up and down. " Well I'll just have to buy you a blue one to reply the pink one, and a ribbon how about that?"

I have happy then, so happy I no longer felt like crying.

But now was different, there was no Dad to make me feel better, there was no comfort of feeling his shapeless man hip supporting me.

There was just me, sitting in the nurses office while she stuck a allergy shot up my arm, in nothing but my bra and panties. Wishing in the perverse way that was only me thinking, that my Mother was here to slap some sense into me, yell at me, tell me that I should have turned away.

I could hear her now, speaking in that way that made it seem like she wasn't speaking to me at all.

" No wonder she can never get any men to like her," she'd say. " can you believe she soaked the first guy to actually give her the time of day."

I hated her.

I wanted to slap her.

Yet I really needed her here to prove just how right she was.

"You're ok. Thanks to those young men who ran you all the way down here. If it wasn't for them you probably would be a swollen pig right now." She laughed. I tried to look anywhere but her face, she was too happy. Why wasn't' she talking down to me right now? Stating the obvious reason for my failure.

" And this your first day?" She asked.

I nodded.

She laughed. " Ok well I'm going to call your Aunt and suggest she come and pick you…"

" No," I said. " I'm ok. Really I am. I can make it home ok." I said. I couldn't bear having to call my Aunt.

" Are you sure?" She asked worriedly.

" Yes," I said. " I'm sure."

" Are you ok to go to class?"

" Yes," I answered jumping down from the bed and grabbing the extra clothes she gave me, as well as the toothbrush. Then taking them too the bathroom I changed and freshened my reeking mouth. Avoiding the mirror as much as possible. I didn't need to see how much worse I looked right now.

" If you start feeling any worse. Come back and I'll see what I can do." She replied as I started out the door. It opened before I could reach the knob.

Uryu the guy from class walked in.

" Time already," the nurse said. " I'll be right with you Uryu."

He shuffled past me, I followed him with my gaze. He turned swiftly at that moment, matching my gaze. I thought about turning and hurrying out the door but for some reason I couldn't move, I couldn't think, all I could do was stare.

His eyes reminded me of the blue dress my father brought me.

Of the ribbons he also brought to match…

The blue portraits he did of Mom and I…

The tips of my Dad's fingers from the markers and paints he used.

" Is there a problem," Uryu asked firmly.

The blue dress…and ribbons…

Shredded by my mother.

The blue portraits…

Burned by my mother.

My father's stained fingertips…

Withered in his grave.

And like these things…

The moment pasted.

I turned around opened the door and stepped out where Ichigo, Orihime and Chad were waiting for me.

"I'm so sorry," Orihime apologized grabbing me by the arms and supporting me.

" Its ok," I said. " It didn't hurt that bad. I've been through worse." I blurted out. Which was the truth.

" Oh," she said her mouth forming a small circle. " Like what?" She seemed somewhat interested in what I had to say.

" Maybe another time," I replied looking away from her face. She was also to happy, happy and gorgeous. Why wasn't she talking down to me?

" Chad I.."

He placed a hand on my shoulder, it was warm.

It made me think about my Dad. How silently understanding he was.

" Thank you anyway," I said.

They were nice…well of course they had to be. I was the new girl, they didn't know me fully.

Give them a week, this act your putting on. Their see right through it. Then the same thing that happened to your dress, your ribbon, the portrait, your father's hands, there'll happen again…

The blue of that guy Uryu's eyes…

The moment will pass, and your have to look away.

* * *

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	5. Chapter 5

**Another Chapter. Enjoy **

**REview..all that jazz**

* * *

August 11-  
_I made it though the first day despite everything that as happened. I didn't want my Aunt knowing about the peanut butter but she knows…she called Rob. I don't think she's aware that I hate Rob._  
(Written on wall next to new bed.)

* * *

I just want to make sure," Rob said on the other end of the phone. I didn't say anything back. I didn't want to talk to him, I didn't want him to know how my day went, I didn't want him to know anything. As far as I was concerned he could take his concern whether it be real or fake, it didn't matter, and fuck himself with it.

There was a steady silence, in which I could hear him breathing, readying himself for the next turn in conversation. I decided to stop him before he could. " I have to go, I have homework."

" Already? Man they don't skip a beat do they?"

I didn't say anything.

" I'll tell your mother you are doing well-" he hesitated. " She was worried about you."

I felt like saying, " Sure she was," but instead I mumbled, " Ok, bye," And hung up the phone. Had it been anyone else I would have felt bad for doing it, but it was Rob, and Rob in my book had no feelings, no need for mercy, he was the one who… I cut off my own thoughts and instead handed the phone back to Aunt Nellie, who was giving the same look the teachers at my old school would give me when I did something unexplainable.

I pretended like I didn't notice and walked past her to my room. There I pulled out my sketchbook and recalled my entire day, right from the beginning, panel by panel word by word, so it wouldn't get lost, just as my father had just done. Ending with the bright of those eyes, for which I had to pull out my watercolor pencils for. It took me all of ten minutes to finish my sketches.

Aunt Nellie came in once I had finished plates of food in her hands. " Dinner!" she called.

" Thanks," I said. She placed the food on the dresser.

" Pretty exciting day?" She said trying to start small talk. I glanced at her, reminding myself that despite how she looked she as nothing like Rob. She may have shared the same smile, the same eyes, they were different.

" I threw up on the back of some guy's pants." I said somberly. The spoiled side of her face went up in what might have been a smile. Then she started laughing, genuinely laughing, not the kind Mom used to give whenever I came around, mocking.

" I'm not laughing at you," she said between giggles. " I'm laughing because…" she snorted. I stared at her for a moment, while she hit my arm, giggling and snorting like I'd told the best joke ever. I should have felt insulted that she'd was laughing at that situation that me throwing up had her in a frenzy, but I felt happy. Covering my mouth I laughed with her.

" It reminds me of myself…" she finished. She stopped laughing then, long enough to glance at my open sketchbook. "That…"

" Its nothing," I said closing my sketchbook, ending the happy moment. Aunt Nellie stood then, shaking off the moment as well. " Homework."  
" Homework," I reminded.

* * *

August 12 - The next morning  
_Lying would be to say I didn't want to go back to school the next day…that I didn't want to see Orihime or Ichigo or Chad again._  
_Lying…would be to say I didn't want to see those blues again._

* * *

I woke up the next morning thinking I was home, ready to get dressed then head for the doors, past Mom who would be sitting down now eating yogurt." Is she gone yet?" Mom would say in that way that made it seem like she was talking to me, but not at the same time.

There was food for me on the table.

But I wasn't home. I was in Japan, and the woman sitting at the table was not my Mother. I started to walk past her, habit causing my every move but Aunt Nellie stopped me.

" Made you breakfast," she said. " Come eat."

I stared at the foreign table, on the opposite side facing me sat a small plate with a piece of baked fish, miso soup, and a small salad. I opened my mouth to say I wasn't hungry but Aunt Nellie was already up pushing me towards the chair.

" I know thin is in," she said. " But you will eat as long as you are here."

" I…ok."

I sat down. She grinned, causing her cheeks to pull up the scars on her face until they were almost not noticeable at all. " I know its not a lot," she said. "I'm just not used to cooking for others."

" This is good," I said picking up my fork and digging in. Realizing just how hungry I was then I shoveled the first bite of fish into my mouth, wasting no time to devour the salad. Aunt Nellie watched me the entire time, not saying a word. Once I'd finished the salad and fish I swallowed down the miso soup, barely registering the lukewarm saltlyness of it.

I was so used to going without breakfast, used to the contractions of my empty belly that continued even on through lunch because I had no money to buy food. The only time I'd really gotten a chance to eat was when Mom decided she wanted to cook something I didn't like, or when Rob came over, bringing or either cooking the food. He would insist I eat, ( under the impression I was starving myself for whatever reason), and Mom would go along with it, smiling awkwardly the entire time.

Then afterwards after we'd all finished eating dropping her plate and Rob's on top of my mine, then declaring, " She was chores to do," and leading Rob away to where ever they went in the evening.

But the days Rob actually came over were so far and in-between that some days I didn't eat at all. Those days were showing on my body right now.  
My fingers of my left hand twitch, I'm itching to write on something, anything. But there is nothing, and the pen I normally use is in my bag.  
" I have to go," I said feeling nervous now.

" Of course, have a nice day."

I'm up and out before she can say anything else. Digging through my bag for my pen and anything I can write on.

* * *

_I passed out in the 6th grade one day from not eating. They called my Mother, she came. She told them I refused to eat. They asked me if it as true. I didn't say anything._  
_I was diagnosed with anorexia and traumatism._

__(Written on side of new bed).

* * *

I missed walking with Ichigo and Orihime today because of breakfast, and by the time I did make it too the courtyard it was already starting to crowd with conversing students. I made my way though them not saying a word, ignoring the looks some of them gave me, ignoring the fact that some of them were ignoring me.

I made it too the classroom where everyone was. By everyone I mean Ichigo, Orihime, Chad and Uryu.

" Do you even know what you're saying?" Uryu said directing his words to Ichigo. He spoke precisely, carefully. His blues were glaring directly at Ichigo.

I sat in my seat and pretended not to see any of them, to keep to myself. Orihime spotted me before I could even pull out my pencil. " Alicia!"  
She was so bubbly. How was she always so bubbly? Bubbly and beautiful, two perfect combinations. I was getting jealous again, jealously and I were not good together. I decided to say something. " How are you?"

She cocked her head to the side then , auburn hair following the curve of her neck. It took me a minute to realize she wasn't looking at me, but Uryu and Ichigo behind me. I didn't turn around to see what it was, and I wasn't surprised then she gently excused herself to follow after them. It was a definitive fact of matter that what they had going on was more important than what I had going on.

" You still have twenty minutes before class starts." I looked up, the teacher stood in front of me smiling. I didn't smile back. " Why don't you explore the school, see what kind of clubs we offer, you might find something you like."

It took me a moment to realize she was talking to me. " I don't know…" I said.

" Sure you do. We have a number of clubs offered here, I wouldn't be any kind of teacher if I didn't tell you to go check them out."  
She wasn't taking no for an answer. I wondered faintly if I would be here in Japan if my teachers back home cared as much as this one seemed too. I stood, leaving my bag and wondering out the door. I had no idea where I was going, and with everyone wondering the halls, talking, laughing, minding their own business, ignoring the new girl, I wasn't sure if I'd get any help anyway. I found myself looking for Orihime, or Ichigo, Chad, even the blue eyed one named Uryu.

Wondering up the stairs past other classrooms until I got to one with the label,

" Crafts Club," above the doorway. I walked in as calm and collected as possible. Hoping that no one in there took notice of me, or saw the small red patches along my arms and neck. Which shockingly when I entered little to no one even looked my way.

Occupying the seats up front were to gawky looking nerds playing strategy card games. In the middle a girl chatted away on her cell phone unconscious or not caring about what was going on around her. And seated in the back was Uryu and a cubby faced girl.  
Uryu was holding a teddy bear whose head was all but torn off.

" Can you fix him? I heard you were good at fixing things, oh please tell me you can."  
He nodded. Then reaching into his bag he pulled out what looked like a pencil box. Then reaching into it he pulled out a needle and thread. After which he proceeded to "fix" her bear. In a speed that may I say was one step down of superhuman. I was staring.

" Oh thank you thank you." She cheered snatching the doll. " Thank you so much Uryu." Leaning towards him she reached out to give him a hug. Throwing a hand out he pushed her slightly away within inches of him.

" Don't," he mumbled. " Your welcome."

" Ok," she whispered blushing and tightening her hold on the teddy as if sacred. She shuttled past me, stopping slightly to look me up and down warily before shaking her head and hurrying out.

I stayed glued to my spot, still watching Uryu, who was now putting up his supplies.

" Do you need something as well?" He asked, his tone implied no emotion, just a simple inquiry. So why did I feel unusually overly nervous? " It is rude to stare." Pale pointer and middle finger went to the bridge of his glasses to push the metal frames up from sliding.  
I could see the blue of his veins through his hands, thin tangling hoses of blood. He was looking at me now, with his blue eyes, eyes that I could compare to a thousand things in my life, most of which involved my Father or Mother.

" I came to join." I said twisting my fingers around one another. " Who do I talk to?"  
A sigh, another push of his glasses." There are no special qualifications," he said. I nodded. " Just show up."  
I didn't answer at first, not knowing what to say after that, then after a moment nodded in his direction. He stood then, he wasn't as tall as Chad but not shorter than Ichigo either, he was taller than me either way.

" Class is about to start," he said. He voice was calm and cool and in a way relaxed me. He walked around me to the door. I followed him out. He made no move to turn around and stop me nor encourage me in the least way. He just continued walking.

We reached the classroom, the others hadn't returned. My face burned and my fingers twitched for my pen and something to write on. In the one minute it took to form that scarse converstion, he'd arisen in me so many different memories, both good and bad. Complications in life I had not yet set to page. He frightened and entranced me at the same time.

This wasn't a book, how could one person make my heart beat so fast, and my fingers tremble so violently. I stole a glance at him while he was setting up for class.

It was stupid because up to this point I told myself I didn't care about the things normal girls cared about, those kind of feelings only occurred in books,in normal girls, yet here they were.

_She really should give up no guy wants to talk to her…_there she was again speaking to me without really speaking to me. She was right though. I snuck a look at him, in the light of the classroom he looked even more paler than before. I knew it was stupid, studying him, but fasniation made my will strong. There was really nothing special about him, he had no orange hair or large bouging muscles, he as average. Adverage like my dad.

* * *

**Uryu **

She was staring again. What did she possibly find so interesting? Uryu thought about turning around and asking her, but thought better of it and instead kept his vision forward. He knew from dealing with Orihime that that some people were weird like that. Still for reasons he couldn't understand, her staring didn't bother him at all that much. He actually wanted to turn and examine her. He hadn't gotten a real good look at her before, like he usually did when he met someone new.

She sighed as he flicked his gaze in her direction. She was fidgeting, her pen in her mouth fingers tapping both sides of her desk. She as average, if he was judging the amercian girl correctly. Her skin was the color of a freshly cooked melon bread, she was loathe smaller than Orihime and not as busty. If had to compare her size to anyone it closely resembled Takashi. Her hair was brown and curly, forming at her shoulders, her face long and cheekbones high against the curve of face.

She glanced around at the same time he turned to her. Their eyes met, brown against blue. No one moved, time stirred. Her face brightened, then faster than it occurred she turned away. Brown. Her eyes were brown. A common color. For a common girl, he thought.


End file.
